Category Archives: Emotions & Feelings

Uncovering The Hidden

I have always talked about the hidden story inside of us that changes our lives when it is revealed. The #metoo movement shows this very clearly. Can you imagine the courage it takes to topple an establishment that persists through fear? For decades the entertainment and other industries have used violence against the dreamers. The dreamers in this case are the people with dreams and goals in their hearts awaiting realization. Young people who dream about gaining a moment in the limelight ended under the oppressive Spector of abuse. Women marry with the idea that they are being protected by love. They follow the footsteps of their fathers, going into the protective forces, military and police only to experience abuse and dismissiveness.
Abuse is mostly used against women, children and vulnerable young men who remained silent because of shame and guilt. Shame becomes like a worm that digs into their psyche eating away at their self-esteem. To deal with this the abused are then preyed on by drug companies and the professionals who prescribe stimulants with the idea is to help them cope with their emotional pain.

Fear of being singled out – fear of being ostracized became the heavy burden the abused bore and this fear caused them to turn to external crutches as coping mechanism.

Abuse is not only sexual, there is financial abuse. People are told to pay their dues before they can have the job or a promotion in a company where fat cats reap the lions share of the profits. In the family there is abuse of status, where the male in the family is still considered the lord and ruler of his domain and the female his subordinate. I have met many wives who were afraid to go out for a cup of tea because she will have to report to her husband why she chose to do something for herself. She will create diseases of many different kinds to get the support she craves. She turns to “daddy” her husband for the support she needs because she cannot do it herself. This is now the time for the veil of negative behaviour to be removed so that we can all live without holding our breath.

False power will always reveal itself. It never goes obscured forever. I look forward to what else will be revealed, such as why some people have such a hard time taking responsibility for their actions while blaming others for the same thing. It is a power strategy based on a deeply primitively survival mentality, but the thing that is hidden will eventually surface, noting stays hidden forever. The ice caps melt, the things hidden for millennia under the ice are being revealed.

Like What You See In The Mirror

Each new year brings along reflections of the year past, what we did correctly and what we did wrong. A new year comes with commitments of how we want to change the tape of our lives so that our lives will flow more in line with our dreams and ideals. As we embark on the journey into this year twenty-eighteen, the questions asked are.

What do you want this year to be?
How would you like it to look on December thirty-first, two thousand and eighteen?

There is a lot that we can do to shift our lives just one degree, which will positively benefit us, the people around us and whom we meet. That one degree activity is to be nicer to ourselves. Not just in public where others can see us doing so, but in our hearts and minds. It is necessary to see ourselves in a truly positive light.

Like what you see in the mirror. #ilikewhatisee.

It can be challenging to recognize when we are being poorly to ourselves. But this will be evident in how we treat others. If we are crumogin with ourselves, we will be stingy with others. If we spend time disliking our looks, our smarts, our financial status, we will show it to others in the way we treat them.

Male-Great-Mormon-ButterflyDo you dislike the rich?
Do you judge yourself for being poor?
Do you not like being different?

You will see it evident in the derisive words you use against people whom you perceive to be different from you. The thing that is hidden within us will always come out. “If you look up, see a person, stranger, someone different from you and immediately take a dislike to them, that person is being a reflection in your unconscious mirror reflecting back what you had been judging yourself about.” It is instantaneous, the magic of the unconscious and energy. The armour we build around ourselves as protection will always wear thin – eventually and the contents will begin to spill out. So too will the light within us spill out and illuminate the world. We can be like butterflies cocooned in our armour gaining wisdom by transforming the negative that we carry against ourselves in our hearts, into the light of illumination. That is what a guru does. That is what ascension truly is.

Enlighten the world from your inside out.

Clear Your Mind For A Positive New Year

Leaving an old year behind is like moving homes. One must hopefully clear out the unwanted objects, clothing, bits and bobs that one has collected and held on to from the previous year or Couple Moving Boxes Between Homesyears, organize oneself and pack the necessary things for the new home. So too with emotionally leaving an old year behind for a brand new year, it is necessary to clean your karmic and emotional home of vitreous so that your new year can be assured. What are you holding on to? What do you need to release that you have carried for so many years to this moment that you are not aware is holding you back?

Over the past several years, I promoted myself as an emotional healer/psychic and those of you who know me, know that psychic is a tool I use to assist you on your quest to understand your life, relationships and motivation. As I leave two thousand and seventeen, I will shed and leave behind  the designation of “psychic” in order to clear up confusion. I am an empath who is also an emotional healer with the ability to see into your story, and I help you to realize your dreams. In spirit there is no time. The expectation on us is to understand the reason for our experiences, good and bad, so that the things we really want can be realized. Are you wanting love to come into your life? My job is to help you look at the negatives that you have held on to that act as a barrier to love knocking at your door. Do you need a change in your job situation? There is always something you are holding on to that keeps you from the new position you are destined for.

Take a look at what you are clinging to, believe me, the reflections are all around you showing blatantly the source of your limitations. In my life I look for the limiting factors entering my life, glaringly reflecting my personal story for my examination. I am in awe of how our inner selves strive to take us on our life’s destiny, if only we are humble enough to acknowledge the things we are afraid of seeing, that we hoard  to the detriment of our forward progress.

At the close of this year, take the time to look at what you want, but are not getting, then look at the impediments in the way. It is right there at your feet, causing you to stumble and keeping you from the door to your dreams. It is time we all clear the way of impediments to our dreams.

And when your dreams appear, it is important that you make yourself remain open to the showers of blessings.

Dealing With The Contradictions Of Life

Life is contrary. We see lots of positivities around us, but then the good is oftentimes defused by random negative acts of people in turmoil. It is easy for us to turn on one another in hate because this is instinctively what a wounded, frightened creature does. We are told many times that love is the only way to heal and defuse pain. But how do we reconcile the love idea when we so deeply feel the fearful events occurring in our world. Lives are being forfeited in attacks of violence all over the world. Will we move into WWIII? Whole countries are being wiped out by environmental influences. It seems as if we are being pushed towards a seeming inevitability. It is like having our feet on the brakes but someone in a vehicle bigger than ours is pushing us towards the precipice and there seems to be nothing we can do about it, because we are locked in our car of fate, our feet locked on the brake.

While all the negativity is going on in the world, we also see its contrast. We see the beauty of a service member rush to put out a fire, save a child, support a senior. We see them, wrapped in the shield of power use their power to make the lives of their fellow humans better. And then we see them use the shield of power to expose their own anger and rage against anyone they perceive to be powerless and weak. Or represent the face or body type of one whom they were taught to fear thus hate.

Most of us choose jobs based on childhood experiences. We choose to protect, save, and feed; we become advocates for the weak and needy, because in our childhood, we were abused, misunderstood, shunned, and unheard. In our adult years we try to shift the wrong that was done to us, by trying to help others. The problem is that if we have not resolved the past pain, we will do to others, what was done to us in the past. It takes a strong individual to look in the face of his past, shift and transmute the pain to help others heal, without transferring his pain and anger onto them. Even to the surrendering of their life, a person lives their childhood story and without thought for self, instinctively face down the harbingers of malevolent behaviour. In this act of selflessness, our heroes faced the demons within themselves which opened them up to their highest good. This is not to say that we need to go out there and sacrifice our lives or challenge the horrors of the world.

What I mean is that if we can realize that the world is made up of people, it may force the human members of such organizations to empathize and put themselves in the shoes of their victims and their families. I still expect and beyond hope for peace on our planet. That is the only way we will heal global warming, injustice, and cruelty. When we are no longer making ourselves wrong, we can stop making others wrong, and then we will see the beauty emitted from ourselves reflected through the eyes of each and every person we meet.

Reflection in the mirror Blog

The Dangers of Comparing Yourself With Others

 

The beauty of all existence
Rests within you
Heaven peers through your two eyes

Compare yourself to another
Watch how quickly the light dies

Thus heaven shows
The healer knows
Unconditional love has no opposites
That is true balance
– Anonymus
It seems that the majority of us constantly view ourselves through the eyes and actions of others. The only creatures, flora or fauna that compare itself with others are humans. We look at the beauty in a flower and wish we could be as beautiful. We look at our predecessors and try to be make ourselves better than they were. This behaviour negatively affects our lives.

What does it do to our psyche when we look to others as the template upon which we fashion ourselves? As children we look to our parents to provide the blueprint for our self-esteem. Comparing ourselves to others cause depression which can lead to negative lifestyles such as drug and alcohol abuse, mental illness and homelessness. When we carry low self-esteem born from comparing ourselves to others, we lose our equilibrium and this affects all aspects of or lives. Ironically, the person we put up on the pedestal may be feeling the same as we do. Most people spend their lives living up to unrealistic goals.

How you avoid the pitfalls of low self esteem? First, positive self-talk is as important as any information from a guru or emotional guide. Self-talk, means the conversation you have with yourself. Low self-esteem comes from negative self-talk.
You are unique. There is no one like you. Even if you try to make the outside of you resemble your heroes what you are inside, emotionally, spiritually and mentally are completely different. Your life story is unique to you. Even with siblings your emotional growth will be different based on where you are in the birth lineup. Your experience with friends will be different because your friends are also unique.

Take the time to formulate positive self-talk. Counter the negative self talk with “and”. For example, I am such a ditz. Improve that self talk with Yes and I am focused in other ways. So, “I am such a ditz. Yes, and I am make the best cupcakes I have ever tasted, and my friends tell me so.”
You are not fighting against or disagreeing with the negative self talk you are agreeing that that is what you think at that moment, and you are also showing your consciousness another more positive point of view.

Have An Adventure And Shift Your Life

There is an old movie called Shirley Valentine, many of you may know it, where a housewife in England made the same meal for her family every week. They had chips and egg on Wednesday and steak and chips on Thursday. Mushy peas, with bangers and mash on Mondays and so on, till she felt as if her life was going around in circles like a one-eyed fish. She, after consulting the wall, took it upon herself to change her life. Her family took her for granted and she was feeling invisible. Most people on the planet have lived lives in stasis. Most have never travelled beyond the boundary of their town or village. We eat the same foods and our familiar circle are people with whom we are comfortable. Humans are a nomadic race of beings. This is how we grew and evolved over thousands of years. Ironically, our static lives may have contributed to the overpopulation we see on the planet today. This has left us impatient with ourselves and others we have what I call nervous leg syndrome. Many of us feel squeezed in our lives and are not sure how to shift the energy that will move us forward. o-happy-facebook

You don’t have to move to Greece like Shirley Valentine, buy a red convertible like older men who have been following the rules all their lives and decide to bust out of their uncomfortable cocoons. Shifting your life can be as subtle as moving the crystal that sits on your alter to taking your first vacation in your life. What you can do to shift your life is to try doing something differently. If you cook rice one way, following the instruction on the box, try a new rice cooking recipe. If it does not come out the way you want or expect, make soup to of it. Or move the furniture in your home. From a Feng Shui perspective movement in your home will shift the energy. Open you front door and back door and allow the stagnant energy to run through. Change the colours you wear during the winter. Add a yellow scarf. These things will go a long way to move your life from the state of stagnation into flow.

Try something new, anything. If you are one to over indulge in the holiday season on the delicious sweets and alcohol, instead of berating yourself for what you do, get some B-Complex vitamins and take more during this holiday time. The vitamins will remove the free radicals in your system and maybe even help you to lose your taste for so much of what you crave. Take the vitamins close to when you drink or eat before or after your indulgences.

Going on an adventure does not have to be crazy. If you want to shift your life even just a little, try taking a different path home. You never know it may open the door to new or more love, like Shirley Valentine if that is what you want. Her courageous decision to run away to Greece caused her husband to reflect and take a risk himself. He shifted. You don’t have to do something as drastic as Shirley Valentine because it is a movie, but something ventured will certainly change your life. Enjoy!

Take A Walk In Another Person’s Shoes

Life is contrary. We see a lot of positivity around us, but then the good is is oftentimes defused by random negative acts by people in turmoil. It is easy to turn on each other in hate, but we are told many times that love is the only way to heal and defuse pain. We see the beauty of a service member rush to put out a fire, save a child, support a senior. We see them, wrapped in the shield of power use their power to make the lives of their fellow humans better. We also see them use the shield of power to expose their anger and rage against anyone they perceive to be like them, or represent the face or body type of someone who caused them harm. We see individuals clothed in mental illness share their pain with others through violence.

Most of us choose jobs based on childhood experiences. We protect, save, and feed; we become advocates because in our childhood, we were abused, misunderstood, shunned, and unheard. We in our adult years try to shift the wrong done to us. As adults, if we have not resolved the past pain, we will do to others, what was done to us in the past. It takes a strong individual to look at his past and shift it to help others to heal, without transferring his pain and anger onto others.

Many of our heroes have been transitioning into spirit. They were the ones who courageously faced down the harbingers of malevolent behaviours and triumphed. You know what they did? Our heroes faced the demons within themselves which opened them up to their highest good. This is not to say that we need to go out there and challenge the system.

What I mean is that if we can realize that the system is made up of people, it may force the human members of such organizations to empathize and put themselves in the shoes of the victims and their families.

I still expect and beyond hope for peace on our earth. That is the only way we will heal global warming, injustice, and cruelty. When we are no longer making others wrong, we can see the beauty emitting from ourselves reflected through the eyes of each and every person we meet.

Blog image words hurt

Political Correctness makes Negative Behaviour

Have you ever tried to cut your own hair or trim a hedge in your garden? You have in your mind the exact shape and length you want the cut to be. You trim one side and then attack the opposite side to balance off the cut. When you look at your hair in the mirror, it seems unbalanced to you. Of course, we are our own critic. In an attempt to create the perfect cut, we see the slight imbalance in our haircut and attempt to fix it. We cut the other side trying to even out the cut and create a total mess. Soon we have cut our hair so short that we have to go to an expert to get it styled in a way that we did not want. The idea for this blog came through a conversation where several people shared their stories about ‘the hair cut’. One lady shared how her mom tried to cut her bangs and left a jagged mess before giving up trying to even out the mistake she had made.

We live in a world that exists in polar opposites. We have the North Pole and the South Pole. We have east and west and each is different, with its own climate, land mass and animals. This contrast makes our world an interesting and varied place. Only one part of the earth can be exposed to the light of the sun. The other, opposite side will always be in darkness, unless there are two suns shining at opposite sides of the world at the same time, and even then some part of the earth will be in partial darkness. This is the same for all of us. Even when we are in a room surrounded by light on all sides, the mass that we are, dark matter, will split the light and cause it to flow around us, thus defining and marking our existence.

For humans to understand the phenomenon called emotion, we need to experience the opposites – sadness, dependent on happiness to understand balance. In order for us to feel the righteousness of forgiveness, we need to experience a wrong and so on. The world and our own psyche are in a state of constant flux trying to create balance, like the pendulum that swings too far to the left and in its momentum back to balance, it swings too far to the right. This continues until the momentum is used up and the pendulum reaches a still point. In the world around us it seems that the political correctness that we embraced for the last couple of decades has swung back and the rudeness that we have kept under wraps is now uncovering itself. The political arena is a prime example. In the past, we fell into political correctness excising the words we innocently used to describe people and events in our environment. We avoided using statements and words to describe an event, a person or an activity that we’ve come to consider as hurtful. This quietened us for a while. But now the negativity is coming at us with a vengeance. We did not understood the emotional effects our words had on others and as we continue in ignorance, we are now feeling the pain that words can inflict.

For the person who spews toxic liquor in words, it is necessary to understood the  effects his behaviour and words have on the people around him. The antidote of issuing hurtful words and action is to realize that we are projecting our pain on to others because we are unable to hold it within. We cause hurt to the perceived weaker amongst us before they can inflict the pain to us. Only a hurt individual will willfully say things that cause hurt to others. Only a wounded individual will be hurt by the words spoken by another.

To become highly evolved beings, to achieve ascension, we need to be aware of our inner angst. In so doing, we will know what will make us react negatively and we can make corrections, creating balance.

Cooking header webblog

Spirituality, Consciousness and Weight Management

The focus on weight and body image is a global obsession. Once upon a time women would have been the ones focussed on body appearance, now men have climbed aboard the fitness train. Food, supplements and exercise include the obsession towards good health. The world of celebrity keeps those interested in emulating others focussed on the attempt to maintain good health. Good health and diet are not exclusive. The world of perceived healthy foods is affecting the planet in adverse ways. Of course while many are starving in some countries, foods being wasted in parts of our developed world.

Many of us find it challenging to get to a weight and size that is recommenced by the medical professionals in our particular country. Our governments put a blanket rule on weight which we try to live up to, but heritage plays a large role in our physicality. I find that certain foods create inflammation in my system. Like turkey and salmon. These foods are supposed to be best for me. Salmon for me is a health food. Whenever I feel a cold coming on, I have a craving for salmon soup. This is a First Nations soup. A piece of salmon filet, skinned and cubed. One large potato, cubed and one large onion cubed. Add this to a saucepan with about six cups of water. Bring to the boil then turn the stove down to medium low. Cook until potatoes are tender. This soup does not require salt, fat or other seasoning. This soup is healing and anti-inflammatory. I must admit that I haven’t had this soup much. Maybe once a year, because colds are rarely a part of my life.

Eating correctly is important to optimum health. This means being aware of the types of food that your body likes. I eat what I like, but I also follow my body’s signals. My diet is very simple and I rarely eat out. When eating out, I avoid salads because restaurants use a plastic bottle to mix the dressings and I can smell the bacteria in the dressing. If I get a salad, I ask for the dressing on the side, that way I can make sure the dressing is free of bacteria. I do eat meat, my grandparents would not have survived had they not eaten meats. I don’t like fish very much. Once I loved fish until I started to be turned off from the fish at the fish shop. Humans are now clearing out the ocean of its fish. To me this means that the food from the ocean may not be so healthy.

Conscious living and conscious eating the right path to better health, which means that we heighten our senses to become aware. In food preparation, the ingredients speak to us. I have met many people who say they dislike cooking, but if you approach food and its preparation the same way you approach meditation, yoga or prayer, you would have a better experience in cooking. Food is such an important part of our health and wellbeing that to say you do not like to prepare the food that will keep you healthy is doing your body and your spirit a disservice.

Shopping for ingredients is really wonderful. Your body will tell you what it wants from one day to another. If you like chilli, your body will tell you the ingredients it wants to make the chilli.

My children learn to cook in by using their intuition. Even when we look at a cookbook, our inner self tells us if the ingredients will work for us that day or not. Of course there are techniques required for special recipes, but when you understand the technique, you don’t have to be perfect at it, just let your intuition and imagination take you to a healthy nourished body. Your weight will even settle to perfection because you are feeling contentment.

Reflection in the mirror Blog

Look At Your Reflection In The Hall Of Mirrors And Find Balance

“You are the centre of your universe. Everything and everyone you encounter is a reflection of your unconscious belief system.” – Sonia Nadina Haynes

It has been said that the world is our mirror. The world as it presents itself to us, cannot be your mirror because you are kind and loving and a being of light.  How does this work with the mirror? When you were born, you knew yourself to be whole, perfect and divine.

Through challenging experiences, where you felt unheard and invalidated, you forgot this information and left the beautiful part of yourself behind. There is a brave little girl and boy, who is creative and fearless, who knows that he and she matters. He will assist your transformation if you stop long enough to hear what she has to say. Many people and especially powerful healers are hard put to connect with that innocent aspect of themselves. Because it requires diving into a pain that is so cutting, it seems impossible that it will end. Not going into the pain however, cause you to feel stuck.

You are left yearning to make a shift in your life and yet no matter how hard you try, the shift is unattainable. It is like in the commercial of the Coppertone child on the beach with the little black dog hanging on to her bikini bottom, our inner innocence holds us in place until we fearlessly allow it to emerge.

We are now in the time of the White Hall of Mirrors in Mayan prophesy. This is a time of reflection, when we face ourselves, becoming the watched and the watcher in our own lives. It is a time where we come in contact with our own inner truth hopefully without judgement. There is no good or bad in this state. It is we who think in such terms, and as we do so the world is reflecting this back to us. We are tossing thoughts out into the ether willy-nilly. I don’t like my hair. How am I going to make it through today? Why don’t I have any friends? Why am I still attracting this type of relationship? How am I going to pay the rent? These questions fill the spaces around us. Because they are questions, they require answers. Our world is constantly attempting to balance itself through presenting answers.

We cannot have the answers because we resist and forgot to look into the mirror. When we look at the reflection within our core we have the power to change the story around us. Pay close attention to the mirror. Be aware that if you do not like yourself, you will bump into people who will reflect this back at you. If you do not believe that what you have to say is important or valuable, you will meet individuals who will leave you feeling that you have no voice. These frustrating unconscious stories will show up in your body as diseases because your inner unconscious self wants you to find the truth, your truth. It needs you to know that you are important. It needs you to release the early childhood imprinting so that you can ascend into your divinity.

Sonia Nadina Haynes is a catalyst for change in the lives of all whom she meets. She is an Emotional Healing Therapist, Spiritual Teacher and Healer. She sees your past, present and future. She tells you what has brought you to this place in your life. What you need to do to resolve the present moment and what you need to do to positively impact your future.
Contact Sonia and heal your life today. contact@soniahaynes.com – 778-786-1301